Picture Perfect

Ever wonder what all the photos on your desk or tacked up in your colleagues’ workspaces mean, psychologically speaking? Well, we have a few theories as to exactly what the contents of your picture frames really say about who you are.

Fido, Fifi & Frodo
If members of your own personal Animal Kingdom at home are what you like to look at while you’re on a conference call or typing up a report, then you may have some attachment issues you may want to deal with, and we’re not talking email. Picture frames void of humans signify that you may have major problems connecting to the human race. If you start to utter meows and ruffs randomly throughout the day, it’s time to replace your pooch’s portrait with something less drooly.

Family Ties
Those of us who surround ourselves with photos and scrapbooks of our loved ones are considered compassionate and pretty well-grounded when it comes to prioritizing business and pleasure. Unfortunately, there’s a big problem if you’re displaying the original photos that came with the frame. Sound absurd? As much as 2% of the population consciously leaves those generic fillers in so anyone who visits them thinks life is more exciting than it really is. Just for kicks, if you suspect anyone of doing this, ask them to tell you the story behind the photos. Watch them stutter!

I’m Soooo Purdy
Although Whitney Houston claimed that “learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all”…look how she turned out. Beware of anyone who has massive (and we mean life-sized) portraits (note the plural) of themselves all over the place, whether at the office or in their personal space. These individuals will stop at nothing to make sure they are the center of attention and anyone who tells them differently will be spit out of the wacky, self-absorbed universe they’ve created quicker than you can say Etch-A-Sketch.

Golden Essentials
If your desktop is habitually cluttered, and you have a hard time finding the tools you need to get the job done, take a look at these eye-catching business provisions that will be noticed even amongst the biggest office-tornado you can create.

Introducing the most glamorous MacBook on Earth, coated in 24 kt. gold with a diamond-encrusted Apple logo. Get one for $8,000 at




Oversized and grand as it gets, this gold-plated desk stapler comes in an embossed, felt-lined gift box, complete with polishing cloth. Get it for $157 at




The gold-sequence Glitzy Pen will make sure that whatever documents you have to sign get the royal treatment. Get one for $85 at